REFLECTIONS ON SSA ( "I'm beginning to think that, in the context of day-to-day living, it is a mistake to self-identify as someone with same-sex attractions.
There are two primary reasons for this. First, homosexuality is not something that normal people should be thinking about on a regular basis one way or the other. It is especially not something children should be thinking about. It follows that forcing other people to confront one's personal sexual disorders is probably not the most charitable way of interacting with them. Second, as has been discussed before in these pages, knowledge of homosexual temptations is a serious impediment to same-sex friendships. By self-identifying as someone with SSA, a person is severely limiting prospects for friendship with heterosexuals. Deep and lasting friendships do not require that one ever discuss what is best reserved to the confessional.
It also seems to me that the language of SSA really obscures the essential problem, which is that SSA, insofar as it is a problem at all, is the predisposition to commit a specific grave sin and is therefore a threat to eternal salvation. Everyone has such predispositions to a greater or lesser degree, and there is a reason we don't tend to wear them on our sleeves. We regret them, we wish we didn't have them, and we don't want anyone thinking such things are essentially unchangeable or beyond the reach of grace. Perhaps we will never be completely rid of them in this life, but in the end we must be rid of them, and so they are not truly a part of our identity. "

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